I have not written in a long time. Sad. The desire to write again seems so daunting now. And difficult. So, here I am trying to organize my thoughts. Perhaps, I will begin with a story.
Incredible things happened the last year. Work-wise, I dove into another world. It was exhilirating. I learned an entirely different skill set which strengthened my resolve to continue to explore and never be boxed in.
On the personal front, we celebrated a milestone for my little darling rascal Kate. She turned a year old towards the end of the year. It was a simple gathering of good friends sharing a sumptous meal and fun entertainment.
On one hand, 2015 also saw me losing some. I tend to keep a small circle of friends. And the friendships that I have kept over the years have spanned decades. I can only the count the rare few that have drifted away. Yet, last year saw me falling out with an entire group. Just like any relationship gone sour, this one didn't have closure (on my part, at least).
Initially, I was oblivious to it. Seemed like I went through the seven stages of grief. Ha ha ha. Disbelief, denial, guilt... all the way to acceptance. A wise friend once told me that in this life, "you win some, you lose some."
What have I realized? Superficial friendships do not survive even the slightest tremor. Real friendships do not withstood time by just counting off the months and years that roll by. The ones who are true stand by you at your weakest and most trying times. Mature friendships do not sneak around and abandon you.
Life happens though. The rainbow after my little storm is the winnowing of the chaff. The gems most often than not get buried way too deep. Experiences like it unearthed the ones worth keeping, and the ones you have to discard.
Life is too precious to be filled with toxicity and negativity. Onward to a life carefully cultivated and nurtured.
Now that 2016 has rolled by, I made a commitment to myself to integrate work as well as my life outside of it.
I commit to invest more time with my little one. Savor each moment as she's literally growing before my eyes. Each day, she's increasingly becoming independent. I hope to keep her within my grasp, needing me.
I commit to take vacations and dates with my husband. Work and home life can be exhausting and consuming. But we have to take time -- to renew, to reconnect, to realign our hopes and dreams. A little romance now and then to keep the fire burning.
I commit to build a home that encourages learning and loving unconditionally. I hope to create an environment where love is best shown in the gestures and expressions to the people around us.
I commit to nurture my container garden. Build with my hands. Grow my own pocket of greenery in our tiny balcony. Learn to grow tomatoes, pepper and herbs. I don't have to be the barefoot contessa to whip up a meal straight from my mini-garden, right?
I commit to read books to keep the mind sharp and fertile. Never stop learning and growing.
I commit to save more. Spend less. Be mindful of habits. Stay within budget.
I commit to be a better person, friend, daughter, mother and wife.
Here's to 2016 with its bright promises and amazing things to unfold.
Cheers!
Xx
Sheng
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