Happy birthday, Ma!

We had a short holiday in my hometown in Davao over the weekend. We haven't been home since our wedding; missed the barrio Christmas celebration. One celebration we didn't want to miss was our mom's 60th birthday. 

 

She had to share her moment with the grand kids.This little boy thinks it's his birthday.

She's now officially a senior citizen. I used to remember my mom being pretty and skinny. She never seem to wear any make-up. She puckers up her lips only on special occasions like attending my siblings and mine's graduation. Or my wedding.

I think life didn't treat her kindly. We were more than a handful growing up. And all her life she had been smoking. I feel sorry whenever I think about how youthful she'd look if only she took care of her skin, didn't smoke and had it easy in life.  

When I think long and hard though, I realized that her weathered appearance is a testament to her selflessness in raising six children, five of them boys. She was our first teacher. She taught us to read, to dream. She instilled discipline in our rowdy brood. She never spared the rod. 

She never held back for us. She worked tirelessly so all of us can get our education. Over the years, we made her proud with our small achievements but we also broke her heart many times over. 

Yet, she was ever constant in our lives. Never asking much. She fuels us with her determination, persistence and love. We're a family that does not openly express our gratitude to each other. So, in small ways we send our messages through food, acts of kindness and coming home. 

Ma, happy birthday! Know that my wings have spread and I have pursued my place in the sun because you inspired me to. Thank you for the the ever constant provision of your time, energy and grace. We love you, Ma. 

It is my prayer that you will live long. And that somehow I'd be able to repay your sacrifices. One day, I'll make the things I secretly promised for you happen. 

Tyrone and I will.

XX

Sheng

Dear Mama

Dear Mama, 

Belated happy birthday!

I thank God that you are in good health despite the smoking. I think your system has been synthesized already. So, am not going to preach about the perils of it. After three decades of countless sticks and packs, I don't think your lungs can handle a hard stop. 

I just pray that you will have time to enjoy your grand kids and a good life. Ma, we never grew in an environment where we were encouraged to openly express our emotions (except for rage -- remember, my teenage angst?) but I want you to know that you're unconditional love doesn't go unnoticed. 

Please know that I cherish you in spite of our differences when I was younger. Now, I know better. Life has been hard but I hope to be given the opportunity to really make it better for you... if not today, in your twilight years. 

I hope that in my little achievements, I have made you proud. My biggest fear growing up is to one day disappoint you by going home pregnant, out of wedlock. Being the only girl in my brood, I carried the torch. I think that at 34, it hardly matters. Not that I plan to be impregnated soon. *coy grin*

I may not agree so much with your parenting style but please know that you are dearly loved and cherished. I've questioned your decisions in the past. Looking back though, my conclusion is that you are just a very giving person. You're the most generous mother, sister, friend, and neighbor. 

You never turn your back to anyone in need. Even if it would mean that your family will experience a temporary setback. You always weighed on the greater needs of others than of your own comfort. 

Ma, I strive to be like you. One who exercises patience and put a lot of faith in people especially loved ones. You will always choose to see the rainbow when it comes to people's shortcomings. 

For as long as I could remember, I've vowed to be never become like you. Yet today, I wish to live my life mirroring your good virtues. 

Rearing six children is no small feat. And I salute you for fighting for your children. For paving the way for me so I can paint my own version of rainbow.

I love you, Mama.